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If you scroll down you will see my article I am that I am. This was received with mixed reactions when it was published.Two readers felt that I was advocating selfishness- saying I am what I am .Accept me as I am if you will or I don't care.They felt that the article smacked of arrogance.
I knew that they hadn't got the essence of what I had meant but then I had no words to explain it clearly to them.
It was a week back that I came across an article which spoke of the mask self. I had always known that we have a lower self or ego which experiences the world and a Higher self ,which can be seen as the figure above the lowest figure in my profile picture.Life is a dance between this Higher self and the lower self. There is a third self the ego takes on to keep up its face in society- the Mask self ,or the self we put on to convince society that we are the ideal people society expects us to be.Once I realized that this masked self is the most dangerous self with its sickly sweet behaviour conforming to the roles society expects you to play, I understood clearly why I really needed to have the courage to accept my lower self and say I am that I am.I am an angry upset person now. I accept it but now that I have the courage to recognize who I am I need not hide my feeling under a mask of politeness. When I am really aware of how I am operating now , I have the freedom to raise my lower self to its higher counterpart. If I don't accept that I am what I am now ,I will bury my feelings and emotions under a mask until finally one day they explode when I am least aware of it.That's how the Masked self has made us victims of emotional outbursts . They are our hidden feelings coming up to the surface for light and resolution.
That also explains why I was hesitant a few weeks back when an organization asked me to contribute to a cause. I wondered if I was being a cheap skates by refusing to saying that I would give only when I felt like giving and to whom I felt like giving.A small voice inside me told me urgently to put my name on the list lest the rest of the group think I was cheap. Needless to say I succumbed to its egoistic pressure and wrote out an amount just to conform and play the role of a contributor.One would think that it was my Higher self telling me to give but now I understand the messages of my Higher self better.
That urgent message had been the masked self speaking.My authentic Higher self self had told me that giving should come from the heart and it should not be done just to keep up appearances.It is a self that needs only to express its wholeness and joy. It needs no ones approval.
I am that I am and when I give in the future , it will be out of completeness as an expression of who I am and now out of a masked emptiness trying to buy peoples approval.
Truly now that I understand my mantra I am that I am and why I need to have the courage to be that which I am, whether Higher or lower, I have been freed.I say courage because it sometimes is tough to be true to yourself when you know society is watching your every move and is ready to judge you but again what is this society we are all trying to please ? It is just the opinions of a given group of people and these opinions can change in the twinkling of an eye and is not worth breaking ones head over!
Higher and lower are only relative states leading to the dance of Life and it is only when I embrace both and enjoy all the moments I go through that I move towards the Absolute who created this light and shadow play.
I then truly enjoy this cosmic dance and dance along !
